Here I go...

Since I started this blog, I've been inspired to try and think a certain way and not be afraid to share my thoughts and not censor myself. I'm not sure I'm really doing that. I do not at all think I am someone or something particularly special, most certainly not more than anyone or anything else but there is this part of me that is enjoying showing-sharing a part of myself to the 'world' this way. I had thought initially it was because I like to call myself an artist. I like entertaining folks. And I think part of it is because I truly like to make people happy - any way I can - but here is the thing: I just went back and re-read my bloggy blogs and felt a little strange. They have this carefully structured rhythm and each is very similar to the next. And it has just dawned on me why, so I thought I'd share-show THIS to the world and let it lie:

I think a large part of why I enjoy expressing myself artistically is because it enables me to have a feeling of control about how people view me. I can define myself through a medium.

What if I stopped defining myself? Does that even make sense? Does that cause an existential downward spiral? Or is that a secret-to-happiness sort of thing? This is a new discovery here so I'm rambly but I feel like I've hit something. Having an 'Ahh' moment, you know?

K. I'm just gonna stop here. Leave it as this before I go off telling everyone dirty secrets about my shaving habits or something. Not that I have strange shaving habits. Just sayin'. But I do grab Greg's shaver every once in a while and attack the little hairs on my upper lip. I've heard I shouldn't do that but I'm too lazy to pluck. Oh Moises Alou...